So despite the fact that I have a lot to be thankful for and a lot has been happening lately, it hasn’t been easy to write this week’s gratitude post. My sensitive/empath side is on overdrive and I find myself feeling for a lot of people going through tough times this week. So many things have happened to others, and I take them on too easily: a car accident, relationship troubles, the death of a local radio personality, the death of my great-aunt, a truck fire we drove past on the bridge.
We were down in the city for a day and a half and that was a great little getaway: fun and stimulating, yet tiring.
I might have a positive day, then feel super down and subsequently become indignant, like Wait a minute, no, I’m having a good time here! Where did that come from? Why do I feel like crying?
Of course, it’s August. I look back to last year, and this is my pattern.
It’s okay; the goal here is not to avoid my depression, or eradicate it from my life. As a dear friend wrote last week, There are things that make it better and things that make it worse, but it will never completely go away. So you have to accept that and just keep trying to do the best you can each day.
(I think I need to repeat that to myself every day)
Without further delay, here is this week’s Friday Gratitude, a day late and no less necessary.
1. I’m grateful for friends who understand. It’s amazing to me the kind of support and connections that have come from my sharing on this blog. It’s worth more to me than I can adequately say.
2. I’m grateful for friends who don’t understand, but do so much to help and make it better anyway. A couple of friends have given me some wonderful suggestions lately for tackling my winter depression, so much so that I’m almost looking forward to the colder weather. Imagine that!
3. I’m grateful for my physical health. Some people have to fight for their bodies to be well in addition to their mental health. I know it’s all inter-connected, but I’m glad my body does what I tell it to do every day, without protest or strain.
4. I’m grateful for the gift of bodywork. Andy and I both had massages on Monday afternoon, and it was such a relaxing, healing experience. Every time I get a massage, I wish I had them more often.
5. And of course, I’m grateful for New York City! The beauty, the art everywhere, the diversity, the food, and the generous friends all fed my soul. I love that we live so close to the city, and it doesn’t always have to be as expensive as we expect it to be. More to come next week on what we did and saw in Manhattan, Brooklyn, and Queens (whirlwind, but somehow it all worked!).
What are you grateful for this week? Do you find yourself to be more sensitive to others lately, like I am? Have you noticed the days getting shorter?
Time is the most undefinable yet paradoxical of things; the past is gone, the future is not come, and the present becomes the past even while we attempt to define it, and, like the flash of lightning, at once exists and expires. –Charles Caleb Colton